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Warning: Could be slightly offensive or hilarious, depending on what you drive...


Ever wish you had a witty acronym to come back at someone with when they're picking on your rig? Well, I've compiled a list of some of my favorites, feel free to use any of them at any time or add your own if you think you have a better one! Enjoy, Happy Tuesday!!!

Acura: All Customers Undergo Repair Anxiety -- Awful,Crappy,Unreliable, Rusty Automobile -- Asia's Curse Upon Rural America

Audi: Aging Unfulfilled Driver Inside -- Accelerates Under Demonic Influence

BMW: Bought My Wife -- Big Money Wasted -- Bowel Movement Wagon -- Break My Windows -- Bring More Wrenches

Buick: Big Ugly Indestructible Car Killer -- Bought Understanding It Can't Kickbutt

Cadillac: Crazy Aunt Drives It Like a Lunatic Across the Country -- Car And Driver Indicates Lady Luck Abandoned Consumer

Chevrolet: Crap Heaps: Expect Very Routine Owner Letdowns, Excessive Trouble -- Cheap Hardly Efficient Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time

Chevy: Can't Have Everything Valueable, Y'know?

Chrysler: Could Have Remained Your Sickly Lame Elderly Relative's -- Company Has Recommended You Start Learning Engine Repair

Dodge: Diddling Old Dudes Get Excited -- Drips Oil Drops Grease Everywhere -- Dangerous On Days Gears Engage

Ferrari: Fragile, Expensive Rides Repel All Reasonable Individuals

Fiat: Fix It Again, Tony! -- Failure In Automotive Technology

Ford: F*cked-up Old Rebuilt Dodge -- F*cker Only Runs Downhill -- First On Recall Day -- Fix Or Repair Daily -- Found On Road Dead -- Driver Returns On Foot (Ford backwards)

Geo: Get Everyone Out

GMC: Great, More Crap -- Got Mechanic Coming -- God's Mechanical Curse

GM: General Mistake

Honda: Hang On Not Done Accelerating -- Had One, Never Did Again

Hummer: Huge, Usually Male Member Enlarger Replacement

Hyundai: Hope You Understand Nothing's Driveable and Inexpensive

Jaguar: Just Another Gearbox Under Annual Repair

Jeep: Just Expect Excessive Problems

Kia: Korean Idiot's Attempt

Lamborghini: Less Able Men Buy Only Really Gaudy High-priced Italian Narcissism Implements

Mercedes-Benz: Mechanical Engineers Regret Choices, Especially Designing Expensive Stuff, But Executives Need Zillions

Mini: Metrosexual Idiots Need Instructions

Mitsubishi: Management Incessantly Tolerates Socially Unacceptable Behavior Ignoring Sexual Harrassment Incidents

Mustang: Massively Ugly Shit-pile That's Always No Good

Nissan: Now In Some Shitty Automobile Nightmare

Oldsmobile: Over-priced Leisurely Driven Sedan Made Of Buick's Irregular Leftover Equipment -- Old Ladies Driving Slowly Making Others Behind Insanely Late Everyday

Pontiac: Poor Old Nitwit Thinks It's A Cadillac

Porsche: Pricks Or Rich Shitheads Can Have ‘Em -- Proof Of Rich Spoiled Children Having Everything

Rolls-Royce: Rich Old Lame Lumps Still Run Over Your Childhood Expectations

Saab: Sadly Absent, Always Broken -- Stupid Arrogant A**hole Ba*tard

Saturn: Slow And Tasteless: Upgrade Right Now! -- Sorry About That Unexpected Recall Notice

Scion: Sad Cars Inspire Only Nausea

Subaru: Shift Up, Because Always Revs Unnecessarily -- Screwed Up Beyond All Repair Usually

Toyota: The One You Ought To Avoid -- Too Often Yankees Over-price This Auto -- Transportation Of Young Or Tasteless Airheads

Volvo: Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object

VW: Virtually Worthless


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